A young leader sensed he stood in the presence of greatness. And he had come prepared.

For John C. Maxwell, it all started with one simple question asked to a school principal in Orlando, Florida, “Who do you know that I should know?”

That question took Maxwell across the continent to legend UCLA basketball Coach John Wooden, one month later.

In preparation for his two-hour meeting, John Maxwell bought and read all of John Wooden’s books. He took detailed notes from which he prepared thoughtful questions.

The Meeting

The two Johns met at 8:30am for breakfast at Wooden’s favorite restaurant.

After 10-minutes of small talk, John Wooden asked Maxwell, “Do you have any questions?”

In reply, Maxwell plopped five pages of questions on the table. Wooden said, “We’d better get started.”

At 4pm that day, Maxwell left Wooden’s home. They’d only gotten through the first page. John Wooden asked, “Would you like to come back tomorrow?”

Like young John Maxwell, we all know people we’d like to learn from. As Proverbs 20:5 says, “Counsel in the heart of man is like deep waters, but a man of understanding will draw it out.” 

Here are five tips to asking excellent questions that transform your life and the lives of others.

1. Be Humble

Proverbs 11:2 says, “With the lowly [humble] is wisdom.”

Humility realizes that all are made in God’s image. That means we can learn from anyone.

Humility also acknowledges how much we have left to learn. Proud people will never ask questions; the humble will. 

Reflecting on his experiences, John Maxwell observed, “As a young leader … I was always in a hurry. I gave a lot of directions and asked very few questions… I was often wrong but seldom in doubt.”

2. Be Sincere

Some people ask questions simply to fill the time, obtain information, or mask their true identity. Good question-askers, on the other hand, ask questions out of genuine interest.

Two of the best question-askers I know have a way of drawing out the best in those around them. Both genuinely care, encourage, and listen with the goal of being able to do something.

Much more than the questions, it’s the way they ask them —you can tell that both fully believe in you and are excited to see what God will do in your life. 

As John Maxwell observed, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

3. Be Teachable

The foolish approach conversations asking, “What can I say?” In contrast, the wise ask, “What can I learn?”

Teachable people learn from the experiences of others, asking questions like the following:

• How’d you become born again?
• When did you and your spouse meet?
• What are the most life-changing decisions you made?
• What top five books impacted you the most and why?
• What did you learn from ___ experience?
• What do you think God might have for you in the future?

Teachable people also seek wise counsel and honest critique through questions.

• What are my greatest character flaws?
• What do you think about this decision?
• What things do you think my generation takes for granted?
• What are the marks of a great leader?

Like John Maxwell, those who are learning and growing constantly ask thoughtful questions.

4. Be Sharp and Attentive

How many times have you answered a question only to realize the asker didn’t fully understand your answer?

Good question-askers don’t just listen to your words; they hear your heart.

They keenly feel and adapt to the flow of conversation, inserting thoughtful questions at the right moment, directing the stream of knowledge into the proper channel.

Excellent conversationalists adeptly understand, rephrase, summarize, clarify, reply, and then ask more questions.

5. Be Eternally-Minded

Good question-askers get other people to think about what truly matters, asking questions like the following:

• Where will you spend eternity?
• How’s your walk with the Lord?
• Are you raising your children to be tomorrow’s forefathers?
• Why do you do _____?
• What led you to make that decision?
• What are you most passionate about?

As Christ displayed, often one good question can convict someone more than a statement.

The Power of Questions

Just as gold mining requires the right tools, so gaining wisdom and impacting others requires the right questions asked in the right way.

What wise people would you like to learn more from? How could their answers change your life?

QUESTION: Which point resonated with you the most?