How to Influence Your Younger Siblings for Eternity

Published by Joshua Bontrager on August 20, 2019August 20, 2019

Galatians 6:7 assures, “Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.” More than most other relationships, this immutable principle of sowing and reaping is especially relevant to relationships with younger siblings. 

You may ask, “Why the focus on younger siblings?” The answer is this: while all sibling relationships are important and must be cultivated, relationships with younger siblings hold the greatest potential for influence. Their lives contain a vast untapped potential to be used for good or evil.

Every one of us can build up our younger siblings by daily sowing the three vital ingredients of example, time, and vision. 

Example

Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity” (I Timothy 4:12). 

My siblings are some of my best friends. While I wish I would have spent more time with my younger siblings growing up, I’m thankful for the many memories we created together. Time spent competing in the Bible Bee, playing games, and working on the farm drew us closer.

Never forget that your younger siblings watch you every day. As older siblings, you have a special responsibility and influence over them that cannot be abdicated or delegated. In every area of life, become a living example. You have an opportunity to model biblical masculinity and femininity, victorious Christian living, evangelism, discipleship, media discernment, the art of communication and friendship, and a love for God’s Word. 

Intentional Time

“Friendships within the family require care and culture as do other friendships. We must win one another’s love within the home doors just as we win the love of outside friends. We must prove ourselves worthy; we must show ourselves self-forgetful, thoughtful, kind, tender, patient, helpful. Then when we have won each other we must keep the treasure of affection and confidence, just as we do in the case of friends not in the sacred circle of home” (JR Miller). 

Healthy sibling relationships rarely occur spontaneously. Indeed, as someone once observed, “What gets prioritized gets done.” 

If you sincerely desire to build strong sibling relationships, begin by scheduling time just as you would for any other appointment. Then, keep that most important commitment, allowing nothing to stand in its way. 

You will have to fight your phone for quality time with your siblings. If you work or study from home, as I have done, you will have to fight the computer as well. If you value your limited time with siblings, you must intentionally disengage from these technologies in order to build lasting relationships.

Vision

God has before-ordained good works for your siblings to walk in (Ephesians 2:10). In His wisdom, He placed you in your specific family in order to build up your siblings for his glory. You alone have more influence than most, even your parents. 

Do you see your siblings as individuals that God could use to change the world through family, missions, business, politics, and?

You have a priceless opportunity to encourage your siblings in their sacred life’s work. Can there be any more noble work than this?

Your younger siblings are in the most moldable stage of their life. You will never have as much influence to shape their character as you do today.

Healthy sibling relationships are built one day at time through example, time, and and vision. Sow the right seeds every day, and by God’s grace, may you enjoy lasting, meaningful, sibling relationships.

Question: How can we influence our siblings for the better?

Recommended Resource: Building Meaningful Family Relationships.