Summer is a great time to wind down and renew. Take a vacation, work outside in the garden, or pick up a good book. 

But summer is also a great time to work on relationships—reaching out to those around us, and those within our families. If you have siblings at home, summer is the perfect time to strengthen those bonds. 

If you’re not careful, summer could fly by without stronger sibling relationships. But a little strategic thought can go far. 

Rethinking Sibling Relationships

Of all the things to do in the summer, why build stronger sibling relationships? Here’s the reality: You don’t have forever with your siblings. In fact, you’ll likely spend a larger percentage of your life not being together every day.

In my own family, four of us are married, and my sister Allison is getting married this August! That means that pretty soon, only five of the original ten will still be at home. I think that my married siblings would agree with me that the time we spent together while still at home formed the strong bonds we have today. 

Having deep friendships and a spiritual bond with my married and unmarried siblings is truly an incredible thing. They make me a better Christian, and sharpen me to be more effective in my Christian walk. 

Focus on Relationship Before Influence

Are you an older sibling wishing to inspire a younger sibling to passionately love the Lord? In order to leave a lasting spiritual impact on your sibling, you must to more than talk to your sibling about the important things—you must first build a relationship.

Whether you’re in a family of two or a family of ten, ask yourself the following question: How strong of a relationship do I have with each of my siblings? 

Deuteronomy 6 describes parent-child discipleship as an ongoing process in the context of real-life interaction. Beneath the command to teach the Word to children lies the assumption that parents will be spending lots of time with children: “Rising up,” “walking by the way,” “sitting in the house,” and “lying down.” This real-life interaction provides numerous organic opportunities for discipleship (in addition to scheduled periods).

In this same way, older siblings can build strong friendships with younger siblings as a platform for spiritual encouragement.

Analyze your relationship with each sibling with these questions: 

• Do my siblings admire me more than other friends?
• Am I one of the most trusted individuals in my sibling’s life?
• Would they rather spend time with me or with other friends?

If you can answer yes to those questions, then you have substantial influence in your siblings’ lives. If not, keep pressing onward! 

Ten Real Things

Wishing you had better sibling relationships won’t change reality. Neither will telling yourself that you’ll have more time later. Truly, there’s no better time to start than the present. Here are ten “real” things to bring you closer to your siblings this summer. 

#1 Do a Bible Study (or Book Study)

This summer, a couple of my brothers and I plan to go through John Maxwell’s book, The 15 Irrefutable Laws of Growth. In years past, I’ve enjoyed studying books of the Bible with my siblings through the National Bible Bee. You can find some great Bible study guides at biblebee.org or wordinthefamily.org.

Key Benefit: Learning together. 

#2 Exercise Together

Exercise could be as simple as a few pushups, jumping jacks, sit-ups, or sprints five minutes each morning. Or exercise could be as demanding as training together for a marathon. 

Key Benefit: Being stretched together. Doing hard things outside of your comfort zone with a sibling will always bring you closer. 

#3 Take a Walk

The countryside where we live offers great places for walking, whether through the woods or on the gravel roads as buggies pass by. But even if you live in town, you might be near a trail. Or you could travel to a state park. 

Key Benefit: Walking stimulates both the mind and body, allowing for great conversations. 

#4 Go Witnessing

A couple of years ago, my brother Denver and I handed out tracts and talked to random people about Christ at a mall, after completing Ray Comfort’s “The Way of the Master.” Just as Christ sent out His disciples two by two, so siblings can You’ll gain strength together as you serve Christ. 

Key Benefit: Be stretched together and grow in boldness. Learn to share the gospel as a team. 

#5 Visit a Nursing Home

Current restrictions and safety measures may vary state by state, but if safe, consider visiting the elderly at a nursing home. Take a couple of instruments or sing some songs. Talk to the residents and ask them about their varied life experiences. Our family began doing this 15-20 years ago. Sadly, many of these people are forgotten and are thrilled to see someone else. 

Key Benefit: Serving those who are often neglected. Learning wisdom.

#6 Start a Business

What could you and siblings accomplish together if you merged your skills and passions? 

• Sell online through Amazon, ebay, Etsy, or other sites. Now’s a great time for this.
• Repurposing old furniture.
• Sell natural animal products (eggs, grass-fed beef, etc).
• Teach music lessons. 
• Do photography together.

These are just a few. Read this article for more business ideas. While I don’t endorse every business idea presented in it, the 101 ideas will get you thinking.

Key Benefit: Leveraging and multiplying skills. Learning business and stewardship. 

#7 Serve Your Church

In I Corinthians 16, the family of Stephanus learned to minister together. One sibling pair I know helps lead the singing/worship period at their church. Find a family or an individual in your church to bless with food or service. Volunteer together in a church outreach activity. Ask your pastor or elders where you can serve.

Key Benefit: Blessing the body of Christ. Working with fellow believers.

#8 Reach Out to Those Around You

One of my sisters once held a book study for some young ladies in the community. Growing up, my family engaged in hospitality often. Find people to disciple and share Christ with.

Key Benefit: Meeting the needs right around you.

#9 Take a Trip or Special Outing

The opportunities are unlimited. About one year before my wedding, my sister and Chelsy attended a memorable instrumental concert. 

• Take a group of siblings to the zoo.
• Go on a picnic.
• Share an ice cream cone.
• Visit the library.
• Visit a National or State Park
• See a historical site. 
• Take an epic trip.

#10 Bless Your Parents

Grateful siblings demonstrate thankfulness through thoughtful service in the home. How could you make your parents’ lives easier? 

Cultivate an attitude of service. Ask for jobs and look for needs. 

It took being a parent myself to realize how much my parents had done for me. 

Key Benefit: Demonstrating grateful service to those who have done the most for you.

Where Do I Start?

Do I do all of these things? Some of them? It may be different varying on your season, commitments, number of siblings. But again, it’ll never be easier than today. 

• Ask yourself how you can best love and serve your siblings. 
• Carve aside time weekly to spend. Prioritize siblings and family over other social functions. 
• If there are anything you do routinely (work, exercise, habits) ask yourself, “How could I incorporate my siblings?”

Above all, remember that family and sibling relationships are among life’s most important relationships. Strong sibling relationships prepare the way for a greater impact on others later in life.

Why should your siblings not be your best friends? Strive to build strong relationships today, and you’ll never regret it.

Last Day to Get 40% Off on Building Meaningful Family Relationships!

Today is the last day of our sale on our book, Building Meaningful Family Relationships. If you want to learn more about the potential and beauty of sibling and family relationships than what’s in this post, visit our store before midnight to get the book 40% off!

Question: What do you hope to do with your siblings this summer?